If I hadn’t mentioned before, my favourite cousin and his wife have been visiting the city for the last week or so. I have had fun with them each time we meet up, which so far has been for two family dinners, a road trip and a lunch.
We have traded stories, listened to music (mostly on the road trip), reminisced about the days when we were little and laughed the whole time. I so love bonding with people over meals. It gives us a chance to slow down and truly our enjoy our food, which we eat so slow because we are also speaking, reconnecting with people. Naturally, I paired my lunchtime meal with a pint of a locally-brewed beer.
At one point in the meal, my cousin leaned over and asked how many beers or drinks I’d already had today. I was confused at first and answered, “Well, this is, and before today the last time I drank was with you, your wife and my boyfriend on Monday night.” Our patio able at Parliament Pub went quiet for a bit, so I re-played the conversation in my head. I realized he was inferring I may have a drinking problem, and I was astounded. So, I quickly did a re-cap. I had told him that my girlfriends and I go out drinking about once a week. And I had made off-handed comments about drinking a problem away, but in what I had thought was a ha-ha kind of way. I was in no way serious. After the pause, I offered, “But, don’t worry about me or anything. I mean, I’ve worked hard for what I have and I’m not going to throw it away on something stupid like an actual drinking problem.”
That was that. But after the bill was paid and I walked back to work, the conversation still bothered me. Do people think that about me? Do I drink like any normal twentysomething? I had always thought the answer was yes, but now the seed of doubt was planted. I completed an on-line quiz called, “Are you an alcoholic?” It didn’t give concrete answers, but said if I answered ‘yes” to three or more questions, I may be at risk. But come on, any college-going student could answer yes to questions like, “Have you ever drank until drunk on more than one night per week?”, “Have you ever done something you regretted while drinking?” and “Has your tolerance for alcohol gone up?”
Have I been wrong to pre-drink and then drink when out with my girlfriends at a bar? Am I wrong to have wine with a good dinner and beer with good company? Am I wrong to do these things more than once a week? I live with another twentysomething in the middle of the city’s hottest bars, what do you expect?
I have always compared my own habits and behaviours with other people to decide if I fit into the ‘normal’ category or not. I definitely am on par with my own circle of friends when it comes to drinking frequency, though I will admit to being able to drink any of them under the table. When reading some of my favourite blogs written by other twentysomethings, it seems as though all meals and social gatherings are accented with martinis and cocktails.
A girlfriend of mine once went to the university health councellor for a re-fill on birth control pills. The health counselor ended up diagnosing her with alcoholism because she said she drank more than once a week, would get drunk more times than not out of those, and because she did not exhibit responsible drinking patterns. I remember we all thought this diagnosis was ridiculous. Maybe if we all look back on our twenties, we will all say, “Wow, did we ever drink a lot!” But are all twentysomethings alcoholics?
My only conclusion is that drinking does not interfere with the normal course of my life. I am attending school and working hard to pay for it, I have good friends and whether we drink or not, we have fun together. Drinking is a fun activity that leads to even more funny stories to tell at the next reunion. I am not prepared to sacrifice it because those no longer in their crazy, young days think my habits are irresponsible as compared to theirs. Please, don’t take the bottle away, nooooo!!!!! (Kidding, though don’t test my ability to stay sober, I’m having too much fun)