Asking Questions Like It's My Job...oh, wait
2:17 PM |


They say to ask and ye shall receive. This is something so basic and simple, I’ll chalk it up to accidental overlooking when people don’t ask. I listen to people whine, “Why won’t he do that?”, “Why won’t they promote me?”, “Where did mum put my socks?”, until I cannot bite my tongue.
"Why don’t you ask?" and then I repeat the old saying, old complete with the word ‘ye’ even.
It’s done me well so far in my (albeit short) journalism career. When colleagues kindly (it really is well-intentioned) advise me not to bother trying to get some info, trying to talk to some particularly difficult source, I often tell them I’ll try anyway. Nine times out of ten it works. Maybe it’s my blond hair, maybe it’s because I asked nicely. Either way, I have found that asking has got me answers. A simple prerogative, yet effective in reporting.
But what about beyond us? Woah. Getting existential, I know. But seriously, what about asking for what we want? Asking God or the universe or whatever force you may or may not believe in that oversees our existence. My Catholic school called it prayer, but I don’t want to use that word here because to me, prayer has been taught to me to be something like this:
“In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit” (fearing that if I didn’t “dial in” to God correctly, he wouldn’t pick up the line)
“I pray that you can please forgive me for being a big fat sinner so that I may go to heaven when I die. Amen” (Religious click as I put down the prayer phone)
At least that’s the take I got.
I probably lost faith in the power of asking God for stuff when he didn’t deliver on my eighth grade requests.
“Please let Nick really like me back and make him want to go out with me forever.” Nick being Nick Carter. It never happened, and so I stomped off angrily, pissed off like teenagers get.
But now that I have resolved that I don’t really want to marry Nick Carter (man, he got fat and ugly) I have returned to the idea that maybe I can ask for stuff, and maybe, by virtue of asking, I will get it.
This hit me yesterday when I returned to swimming laps. (I thought it was so easy. 40 laps and I was laughing. Until about an hour later, when my legs gave out and I was comatose) I thought, maybe instead of asking for things like patience and courage and stuff, I could ask for specifics, so God wouldn’t get confused and give me patience while sleeping or courage when peeing. You know, couldn’t hurt to clarify.
So I thought I’d ask to become closer with my mum. We’re close, and having a blast planning the wedding, but there’s been an unexplained awkwardness on my part when talking to her. I have no idea why. She has even asked me what’s wrong. So I put it out there.
“Look, I have no reason to be all awkward. She’s my mum, she’s let me puke on her. She’s seen me embarrassed beyond belief. Can you make me less awkward when I talk to her so we get get past said barriers and get closer? Thanks.”
I also asked for more opportunities to meet friends here. Between work, the drive, and home, I haven’t met too many people, and I’d really like to have something more to do on a FRiday than hang out with Goober watching “Monster-In-Law.” I asked for a friend or two, people to call here when fun things happen, to gossip with about American’s Next Top Model, and to go OUT with on weekends. Thanks.

I’ll let you know if I receive. For my part, I will be consciously trying to push these things along too. Cuz I know God has like a bajillion people to answer to.

I wonder what Nick Carter asks for...

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